In 2021 I walked into the Emirates Stadium in London as an agency worker.
Until that point, I had been snapping up the best paid Front of House jobs. Pouring endless bottles of Prosecco for the Bottomless Brunch at 100 Wardour Street and having selfies taken with drunken twenty-somethings who enjoyed my striking resemblance to Kris Jenner.
The most common question my young colleagues asked me when they heard about my Masters, was;
“Can you tell me what’s wrong with me?”
It broke my heart a little each time. I told them, they weren’t going to like the answer. That there was nothing wrong with them. They do not need to be fixed.
It was an insufficient response and there wasn’t time to counsel them towards their own solutions to a maladaptive world.
I waited on tables at a banquet at the Royal Air Force Club on Pall Mall and was amused to see that it was an event held by a company I knew. I stood back, amused as I listened to the asinine conversations and recognised seven or eight faces that I had previously encountered in my old life.
Of course, not one of them spotted me. A faceless server in black and white. Invisible.
I felt a great surge of gratitude to be exactly where I was. Seventy old men in shades of grey and navy and a handful of women nodding politely as they were talked at and over. No thank you.
‘You are a Chef today.’ They told me. OK, I thought. I guess this is how it works. No problem. I wasn’t a fan of the uniform.
After sitting around a box kitchen for several hours, a frantic team leader yanked me out. I was meant to be in something called ‘The Diamond Club.’ She was rattled. How had I managed to get into the Diamond Club on my first day, she wondered.
I assured her I was not a chef and I had no idea what this club was.
Turns out The Diamond Club is the culinary jewel in the crown of Stadium fine dining. Overseen by Executive Head Chef, Raymond Blanc and his wonderful protégé Tommy, this is the kitchen that freelance chefs all over London aspire to get into.
Bustled into the kitchen that was already prepping for service, I was thrown in at the deep end to ‘man’ a hot section. I blanched, piped, dipped and prepared everything exactly as I had been shown. I cooked and plated my dish for pre-service tasting and then we were off!
Two hours of service. A slow start as the starter team plated and served. The screens filled up with orders and now it was my turn. Pirouetting, plating, frying, more frying. Peas, fish, triple cooked chips stacked to three levels, fingers burning as I positioned scolding hot food onto warm plates. Over and over again, each item cooked as instructed, each plate presented perfectly. Checked by Tommy and then out to the eagerly waiting clients.
Tommy saw something in me that day that I might not have noticed. He asked me to come back and work the season. I knew I had performed a difficult task adequately but I was not a professional chef and this was no ordinary kitchen.
‘Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer to bring in an actual chef?’ Honesty being my best policy.
He told me my performance more than qualified me as a professional, in both cooking and character and we could figure out the rest later.
I would never have been able to embrace that opportunity if I was not well down the path of Coaching and sponsorship. I felt strong, confident and capable and most of all, I felt appreciated. Something I had not felt, maybe ever, in my previous places of work. Workplaces hadn't changed. A kitchen was no different to an office. I had changed.
Within six months I was qualified and picking up Chef de Partie and Lead Chef positions. Coming in over chefs who had been cooking for twenty years. The VIP Super box at Wembley was my domain. A seventy-cover restaurant for FIFA’s top brass, it was my responsibility to give them best culinary experience with the food we had spent the previous week preparing.
I now had two portable careers and a Masters. More progress and personal growth in three years than three decades in my career. My presence in those kitchens encouraged others to further their own education and enhance their qualifications. Influencing by example that if it was possible for me, it might be possible for them too.
I didn’t know I had France in my future.
Fast forward to today.
After the false start, I began again a year later. A new village, a new home and an unshakable confidence that advocating for myself, my abilities and my experience were all leading me down the path I was meant to be taking.
Without my Masters I would not have been eligible for a Profession Liberale visa to live and work independently in France. As a therapist, my qualifications would not be recognised in France with a lengthy process to retrain and validate my experience and all in French!
Without my cheffing experience, I would never have picked up work in my local restaurant, twenty seconds from my front door. Integrating me further into my new community and freely publicising my availability as a Personal chef.
It is eighteen months into my tenure in France that I begin my adventures into real estate. Prioritising English speaking first time buyers. Two years ago, this was me. I made mistakes. I trusted a madman. After that, I figured everything out myself. Taking great advice from the right kind of people and ignoring the rest of the noise.
Because now I can discern what is good for me and what is a projection. I can see more clearly what is meant for me and what belongs to someone else.
I have found another piece of my puzzle.
A US based International company with agents all over the world, this is where my old life and my new life begin to merge. A week of online training in French with my trusty translating app, I realised how much I missed selling. Remembering that I don’t close. I guide people to close themselves on their own futures.
The systems and processes are so familiar. Warm and comforting like putting on my winter gloves for the first time as the weather chills. The language and psychology of sales is no different to coaching, when a coach’s intention is to facilitate an outcome for a client that enhances their future goals, purpose and wellbeing.
I cut my kite strings when I left London. No one and nothing to return to. I did not come to France to be an expat. I came to France to embrace a new life and do the hard things that come with that. With everything lining up, my biggest challenge is language. In four years I will apply for citizenship and I need to prove a much higher level of language proficiency than I currently possess.
I could spend months and thousands on lessons, or I can jump into a career that not only allows me to support people with a dream, much like mine to take the first steps towards their aspirations while marveling at the beauty and charm of the properties here.
Something I coulda, woulda and shoulda done years ago. So many missed opportunities to have arrived here faster. By here, I mean finally doing the things that feel good to me.
The language and psychology of the sales process are no different from coaching.
We are conditioned to mistrust sales people and particularly estate agents but consider this; we are all sales people. We don’t like to admit it. We can talk ourselves in and out of absolutely anything. We are selling to ourselves all the time and our thinking is incredibly convincing. (Next blog is on this topic)
As I learn to communicate within a sales process in a second language, I am also acquiring the vocabulary to be able to coach in French. It is another sign on the road that is being laid out just for me to walk and for that, I am profoundly grateful.
Upcoming topics - The Psychology of Sales ain't so different from Coaching and WE ARE ALL salespeople whether we see it or not and when lying is a choice and when it isn't. Are we all addicted to self-deception as a self-soothing mechanism? I'd like to talk about portable and portfolio careers too. Let me know what floats your boat!
Thanks, as ever for following along.
Peace & Love,
Elizabeth & Jonnie
Note: Images are my own. Taken during service in the Diamond Club kitchen at Emirates Stadium. Plates designed by Raymond Blanc, 2 Star Michelin Chef, London.
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