Part 2: What is Radical Flourishing? For the practically minded and spiritually curious.

I help high performing women (which is all of you BTW) trapped in professional (and personal) compliance cut through the chaos, embrace creative defiance to achieve Radical Flourishing and beautiful, significant work.

Always remembering, our lives are the work.

By oatawa

Radical Flourishing is the audacious act of building a life of profound well-being and purpose not in spite of historic adversity but directly because of it. It is the intentional and rebellious refusal to let past intentional harm define your present or future. It is the growing awareness that the path we have walked and the goals we thought we needed to reach were never truly ours. The term “radical” is twofold:

1. Radical as in “Root”: It goes to the very root of your being, addressing the subconscious patterns and untreated cycles that have, until now, governed your reality. This isn’t superficial change; it is a fundamental re-engineering of your inner world.

2. Radical as in “Defiant”: It is a revolutionary act against the societal and personal narratives that say a life defined by pain must remain so. It is the defiant statement that your suffering is not a life sentence but the raw material for your greatest work. (A psychology researcher beautifully articulates why people comply and describes the Science if Defiance in this article)

NOTE: ‘Our greatest work’ – Often this is something we already do or have done. It lies dormant, underappreciated and forgotten.

Example 1: Coaching Client A – A PhD in Oceanography and Marine Sciences, an intrepid Polar Region Guide who earns more in 6 months of employment than most earn in a year of employment. A was sabotaging her own present and future success and joy because she had not yet been paid to coach or speak. Forgetting entirely to leverage every aspect of her experience to enhance, not only her own sense of self but to loudly demonstrate to potential clients how fearlessly she led in other aspects of her life.

Example 2: Coaching Client O – Director level, wife, mother who experienced her first redundancy at the age of 45. Frustrated and fearful during what turned out to be a short gap in employment, she was 24 hours away from ploughing 10k into a start-up partnership, to emulate her parents success as Business Owners. The thing was, she was one of the few people I met who truly loved her job! And she was amazing at it. Patience, persistence and a renewed confidence in her abilities and everything worked out.

Example 3: Me - From Corporate to Coach, Chef and Celebrant. From London to the Southwest of France. Pre-empting problems, mitigating risk and sinking under the weight of the perfect spreadsheet and the expectations of others. Finding freedom in the structured chaos of a kitchen and empowering others to share their stories through facilitated coaching and sharing the purity of love stories while they are still fresh and beautiful.

While traditional flourishing aims to cultivate well-being, Radical Flourishing is a process of transmutation. It turns the lead of lived trauma into the gold of meaning, wisdom, and compassionate action. It is the ultimate expression of your philosophy that the “patterns and chaos” of your untreated mind can be a catalyst for a life of intentional beauty and impact.

Flourishing in Positive Psychology

In positive psychology, flourishing is a state of optimal human functioning. It is more than just happiness; it is a holistic sense of well-being that combines feeling good with functioning effectively. Martin Seligman, often called the father of positive psychology, introduced the PERMA model as a framework for understanding and achieving this state. It is a comprehensive, five-component model of well-being:

• Positive Emotion: Experiencing a range of positive feelings such as joy, love, contentment, and gratitude. This component is about having more positive than negative emotions.

  
  

• Engagement: Being fully absorbed and engrossed in a task or activity. This is the state of “flow,” where time seems to stand still because you are so focused and intrinsically motivated.

  
  

• Relationships: Having strong, meaningful, and positive connections with others. Social bonds are a fundamental human need and a critical pillar of well-being.

  
  

• Meaning: Belonging to and serving something that you believe is bigger than yourself. This could be a cause, a community, or a purpose that gives your life direction.

  
  

• Accomplishment: Striving to improve yourself and mastering a skill. It involves setting and achieving goals that provide a sense of competence and success.

  
  

This model provides a clear, evidence-based roadmap for living a good life. However, my work takes this a step further by grounding it in the reality of trauma and using that trauma itself as the fuel for each of these components.

A Life of Radical Flourishing: What It Looks and Feels Like

For a person who is radically flourishing, life is not an absence of challenge but a state of dynamic engagement with it. It’s a life where the old triggers no longer hold power, because they have been re-contextualized as signals for growth.

• Emotional Freedom: The constant, low-level anxiety or reactive anger that once dictated my life is gone. I still feel negative emotions but they don’t consume me. Instead, they are momentary visitors that I can observe, understand and release. There is an undercurrent of profound contentment, not because everything is perfect but because I am no longer at war with myself.

  
  

• Engaged Purpose: My work is not a job; it is a vocation. It’s my life. And not in the unhealthy way that it used to be. My philosophy of Work Beautiful becomes a lived reality. (See previous Blog Series) I am fully immersed in tasks that align with my deepest values, creating a life that feels like mine and deeply satisfying. This isn’t “work hard, play hard” anymore—it’s an integrated state of being where my purpose is my play.

NOTE: I have been heard to say, “My life is my work.” To some who don’t know my story, this might sound overly dramatic. Theatrical, even. But is stems from the realisation that if I am not working at intentionally creating a life that reflects my innermost desires, then what the hell am I doing?

• Authentic Relationships: The co-dependent and chaotic relationships that once mirrored my internal state are replaced with ones built on mutual respect and psychological safety. I attract people who see and celebrate the real me because I am no longer hiding from myself. My community is no longer a collection of enablers but a network of generous, dynamic, consistent and motivated creators.

  
  

• Profound Meaning: My past is no longer a wound but a wellspring of meaning but it is a daily practice to ensure it remains so. I understand that suffering has a purpose: to prepare me to work with others. Every difficult experience becomes a story of triumph, a lesson to be shared and a bridge to connect with those who are still struggling. This is the essence of my Quiet Waters philosophy—turning personal refuge into a beacon for others.

  
  

• Unstoppable Accomplishment: The old cycle of self-sabotage is broken. The goals we set are no longer external validation-seeking exercises. They are a reflection of our genuine desires. Each accomplishment, big or small, reinforces our belief in ourselves and proves, each day that the patterns of the past have been broken for good.

The Path to Radical Flourishing: The Science and My Expertise

Getting to this state is not easy, and it requires both scientific understanding and courageous action. My work offers a profound insight into this process:

• A Fearless Inventory: My experience with the 12 Steps (12 Spiritual Principles) is a critical component. This “fearless moral inventory” is a core psychological act of self-confrontation. It is a rigorous process of honest self-assessment, a cornerstone of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and other evidence-based therapeutic modalities. It requires the willingness to sit with discomfort and acknowledge your role in creating your reality, rather than just pointing fingers.

  
  

• Integrative Meaning Therapy (IMT): Your Masters Research on IMT is the theoretical anchor for this process. IMT, as developed by Dr. Paul T. P. Wong, is a therapeutic framework that helps individuals find meaning in their suffering. It suggests that a person’s ability to flourish is directly tied to their ability to construct meaning out of their most painful experiences. This is why you cannot “just get over” trauma; you must integrate it as a part of your life story, a crucial step that distinguishes your philosophy.

  
  

• Neuroplasticity and Habit Stacking: The “next right action” is a concept deeply rooted in the science of neuroplasticity. Every time you choose a new, healthier action, you are physically rewiring your brain. You are building new neural pathways that make it easier to make positive choices in the future. The simple, consistent act of choosing to “do the next right thing” transforms the old patterns into new, life-giving habits.

By Talia M/peopleimages.com

The Consequences of Not Flourishing

The alternative to Radical Flourishing is not a neutral existence; it is a continued state of decline. The consequences of not doing this work are severe and cumulative, often leading to a life of quiet desperation.

• The Vicious Cycle: Without a radical break from the past, the “patterns and chaos” of your mind will continue to co-create a reality that reinforces your deepest insecurities. You will find yourself in an endless loop of toxic jobs, unhealthy relationships, and unfulfilled potential, all of which will validate your subconscious belief that you are unworthy of a better life.

  
  

• Erosion of the Self: Unaddressed trauma doesn’t just sit there; it metastasizes. It erodes your self-worth, leading to depression, anxiety, and a chronic sense of powerlessness. You will continue to react to the world, rather than acting with intention, living a life of quiet rage and resentment.

  
  

• Stagnation: Instead of flourishing, you will stagnate. Life will feel like a constant struggle, a series of battles you can never truly win. You will be a passive observer of your own life, watching as your potential remains unfulfilled and your dreams turn to dust.

In conclusion, my body of work provides a powerful, actionable and deeply personal answer to the question of why and how we create our reality. It is a beacon for those who are ready to stop surviving and start radically flourishing.

My expertise in corporate wayfinding, combined with a challenging personal journey, makes me uniquely qualified to guide others on this crucial path from the chaos of an untreated mind to the profound beauty of a co-created life.

Subscribe for the access to the final two installments in the series and drop ‘RADICAL’ into the comments if you would like a copy of my FREE resource on why change is so challenging!